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The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations
Suicide loss changes everything. The Leftover Pieces® Podcast explores life after suicide through honest conversations with survivors, experts, and grieving parents learning to live forward after unimaginable loss. Parents, partners, siblings, and friends share what it means to keep living when the world has been forever changed.
Hosted by Melissa Bottorff-Arey, whose 21-year-old son Alex died by suicide in 2016, the show blends intimate conversations with survivors, healers, and mental health professionals with short solo reflections you can actually use. Together we explore child loss, trauma and nervous-system care, anniversaries and seasons, stigma, faith and meaning, legacy, and the everyday practices that help make life livable again.
At its heart, this podcast is about learning to live forward after loss. We never move on from the people we love, but we can learn to carry the grief differently. This road can feel incredibly lonely—but you are not alone here.
For supporters, educators, and professionals, these conversations also offer insight into the realities of suicide grief and what genuine, non-fixing support can look like.
If you’d like to share your story or expertise, you can request to be a guest through Melissa’s website.
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Content Note
This podcast speaks candidly about grief and suicide loss and may feel activating for some listeners. We avoid graphic descriptions and discussion of suicide methods. Please care for yourself as needed. Melissa is not a doctor or licensed therapist, and nothing shared here should be considered medical or mental-health advice.
The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations
Above The Rug; A Suicide Widow's Tale
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
In this conversation, I talk to Lindsey Doolittle, a suicide (police sergeant's) widow, a loss survivor, but also an advocate and an activist, an artist and an author. We discuss how her husband's police department shunned and shamed her, where she found hope, and how she is living with her loss while providing meaningful support to others now. There is a LOT to take away from this conversation!
In Lindsey's own words... "I choose not to sweep my husband’s suicide under the rug. I’ll never get over his death, but I can get through it..by speaking out and raising awareness."
Here are all of the websites and more we talked about during our conversation
Get her children's book "Goodnight Mr. Vincent Van Gogh" here on Amazon. (This book is also a part of the permanent collection at the Vincent Van Gogh library in Amsterdam! :)
Above The Rug Advocate, Activist, Suicide Loss Survivor (Lindsey's website including links to her social media, etc)
Blue H.E.L.P Honoring the Loss of Police Officers who have died by Suicide
Through This Together (Online Support) A Journey Through Grief Together
SASS-MoKan Suicide Awareness Survivor Support serving Kansas & Missouri
N.A.M.I National Alliance on Mental Illness
If you or someone you know is struggling PLEASE reach out & talk to someone
The National Suicide Lifeline is there for you
IN a crisis you can also TEXT--->
TEXT the word "HOME" to 741741 in the USA
in Canada TEXT 686868
in the UK TEXT 85258
And Grievers, I am always here. You can find me on Instagram at The Leftover Pieces
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Get THE Leftover Pieces APP & don't miss anything! CLICK HERE
💜 The Leftover Pieces is support central for grieving hearts.
🔗 Stay connected: Join my free email community for weekly check-ins, resources, and encouragement.
🌟 For moms: Explore the $9 Lighthouse Community — safe connection, tools, and hope.
🛠 Resources for all grievers: Start here.
🤝 One-on-one grief coaching for moms after child loss to suicide: Learn more here.
📞 Need help now? If you or someone you love is struggling with suicidal thoughts, dial 988 in the U.S. & Canada, or text HOME to 741741.