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The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations
Suicide loss changes everything. This show is about life after suicide—real talk and practical support for grief after suicide: parents, partners, siblings, and friends finding their footing again. Each week, we explore what helps in suicide bereavement so you can keep going with honesty and hope.
Hosted by Melissa Bottorff-Arey, whose 21-year-old son, Alex, died by suicide in 2016, the podcast blends intimate conversations with survivors, healers, and mental health experts with short solo “Daily Nugget” episodes you can actually use. We cover child loss, trauma and nervous-system care, anniversaries and seasons, stigma, faith and meaning, legacy, and the everyday practices that make life livable again. You’ll hear grounded tools, language that honors your person, and the reminder that you are not broken—you are grieving.
For supporters and educators, these episodes offer insight into the realities of suicide grief and what genuine, non-fixing support looks like. If you’d like to share your story or expertise, you can request to be a guest via my website. 💜
Content Note
This podcast speaks candidly about difficult experiences and may feel activating. We avoid method details and graphic description. Please care for yourself as needed. I’m not a doctor or licensed therapist; nothing here is medical or mental-health advice.
The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations
Grief After Suicide: Repairing Misattunements—Simple “I Wish I’d Said…” Scripts
Small, honest repairs protect your energy in life after suicide loss—one kind line can reset connection -- reset a missattunemnet--and settle a day.
Journal prompt: “Today, permission looks like…”
A misattunement is when the response misses the moment—yours or theirs—so the nervous systems don’t line up and everyone leaves a little off-key. “I wish I’d said…” scripts are short, kind repair lines you can send (or say to yourself) after the fact to realign—no essays, no debates, just a clean reset.
If you want quick examples to ground it:
- “I appreciate you trying—today I need listening, not fixes.”
- “I’m not up for this topic; can we revisit tomorrow?”
- “I wish I’d said no earlier. I’m choosing quiet now.”
Not every miss needs a summit. Today we use small, honest repairs that respect your energy.
A Flicker (Hope) — Relief after a clean repair
One line sent kindly can settle a day. Notice the calm that follows.
To Rebuild (Healing) — Choose one script
Delay: “I needed time to think. Here’s what I wish I’d said…”
Boundary: “Advice isn’t helpful right now. Listening is.”
Name it: “That comment was hard for me to hear. Can we try again?”
Take a Step (Becoming) — Low-stakes delivery
Pick the safest person/context. Send or say the line once. Then do a 30-second shake-out or long exhale to reset your body.
Choose-your-energy menu:
- Hollow (low): Write your repair line in notes only. No sending today.
- Healing (medium): Send one repair text or say it in a calm moment.
- Becoming (higher): Schedule a brief follow-up chat to close the loop.
Permission for Today:
Repairs are not performances; they’re course-corrections. Every time you name what’s true without blame, you lower the static and make space for connection that can actually hold you.
Exhale. Keep what serves you; leave the rest. I’ll be here again tomorrow. 💜
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💜 The Leftover Pieces is support central for grieving hearts.
🔗 Stay connected: Join my free email community for weekly check-ins, resources, and encouragement.
🌟 For moms: Explore the $9 Lighthouse Community — safe connection, tools, and hope.
🛠 Resources for all grievers: Start here.
🤝 One-on-one grief coaching for moms after child loss to suicide: Learn more here.
📞 Need help now? If you or someone you love is struggling with suicidal thoughts, dial 988 in the U.S. & Canada, or text HOME to 741741.